It seems I've really badly pulled a muscle in my right leg, it's so sore, plus my legs are just generally knackered anyway, so..
Luckily all of this art has kept me well and truly on my toes today, which means luckily I haven't had time to think about the fact I walked into the jaws of hell and what not.
I feel like a complete Judas for blurting everything out like that earlier, but I felt like I had to. Naturally the response was mainly people giving their own scenarios and unfortunate events etc. But it definitely helped, I think.
In a really strange way I'm going to be upset when the Art exam is over, it kept me thinking about one thing and only one thing. Now I have to think about every other planet under the sun for my exams next month as well as just everything else in general. SHIT I have got so much business studies to do, I've just realised. I'll hopefully do it by next friday so that I can report to tiddy that I've done it and the wheels can start turning etc.
I know what everyone's thinking. They're thinking, look at her, she's fine, what is there to worry about? Or more likely, they just don't think at all because after all, I'm a bit of a nobody at school as it is anyway. I'm so completely useless at showing what I'm reaaaaaaaaaally feeling, it's a talent of mine to mask everything and appear fine. I'm also useless at telling the truth.
I really don't want to go back there, I'm not ready and I don't know how to be normal anymore because I'm now oh so aware that I'm not.
To be completely honest, today was a complete blur, and I don't think I'm going to be able to gain any real acknowledgement as to what I really felt about any of it all. I reckon I will realise on friday, not that it's pre-meditated it's just mathematically that's when it will most likely happen.
Everyone listen to treefight for sunlight, NOW!
On those notes, goodnight
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